Mad, Mad Scientist

I wish I were a mad scientist. Is that enough to constitute a blog post? One wishful sentence. Probably not, but that doesn't mean it's any less true.

Part of the problem is that I don't have a laboratory. I have access to a space that could be a lab, but no one has given me permission to clean the space up and transform it. Sad. Like a hermit crab without a soda can.

What would I do in this imaginary laboratory? Research, develop, and build computers, robots, and (oh yeah) hack and modify video game consoles. This seems like a phase I go through: it gets cold and dark out in the world and I desire to take things apart and build something better.

Things have flared up again with the original Xbox. I found a pretty sweet and thorough video about the soft-modding process and swapping out hard drives. The original Xbox has an 8 GB hard drive (which seemed like a lot at the height of its console days) that can be easily upgraded to 320 GB or even 500 GB. Considering that I have 8 GB SD cards spilling out my ears now, upgrading doesn't seem like a bad idea.

Finding the right kind of hard drive might be a challenge. In the video, the guy pulled one out of an old computer. I'm not sure I will be able to do that. The computer stuff is always a little complicated. I've successfully soft-modded a Nintendo Wii and completely bricked a Phat PSP. So, despite some success, I'm always a little nervous about this sort of thing.

I'll have to take inventory of older computers that I have around and see what I've got for hard drives. My biggest problem with this stuff is that if I do it (or attempt it) then I stop messing with it for some time, I'll forget all about it and how I did it.

My Wii is probably my best excursion in this realm because I kept track of everything that I did step-by-step and I have a folder with all the set-up files, channels, emulators, and everything else that I downloaded still on my computer. I also use this modded Wii enough that I remember everything. That's important too.

Shopping: Yoda's Christmas Miracle

I love Amazon. Totally free advertising right there. You are welcome Amazon (though it probably makes little difference to you).

Online shopping is the only reason that I have gifts to give around Christmas time. I hate shopping. I really do. All kinds. Even grocery shopping pisses me off.

It started with just a couple things from online venues and the rest from brick and mortar stores. Not anymore. No brick and mortar. Ever again. Yep, that's right. I basically do all of my Christmas shopping online.

With only a couple of days before Thanksgiving, I still have gifts to order. My nephews get nerf guns and Legos; they're the most fun, which is where Yoda enters this story.

Christmas shouldn't be about winning or losing, but I won Christmas last year with my sister and her two boys. I gave them a Lego Advent calendar. Every day of Advent they opened that day on the calendar and they found a new thing to build. Usually a ship or Lego man. Lego Yoda was the last one on Christmas Eve, I think.

Apparently, it was so much fun that the boys have requested another one. I think I can make that happen, but this year's calendar comes with a Christmas Darth Maul. I don't think he's as festive as Yoda. Christmas Yoda could kick Christmas Darth Maul's ass any day of the week.

Marvel Movies: No Angry Comic Nerd Here

Recently, a friend asked me this amazing question: "When it comes to Marvel comics converted to movies, are you usually satisfied with it, unhappy with it, or both?"

Sit back and let me show you a whole new world (and why I'm totally fine with Marvel movies not being true to their comic book counter parts).

The Short version: Marvel's characters are always being re-created and re-imagined; their stories are constantly being retold.

The Long version:

Every single character and story created within Marvel Comics exists in the Marvel Universe (think Multiverse).

The Marvel Universe consists of parallel dimensions (I'm using 'dimensions' in place of universes because it makes more sense to me). In each dimension there is a Spider-Man, an Ironman, a Deadpool, and a DoNothingMan. Each dimension has it's own little twists. This allows for the Marvel writers and artists to infinitely create (or kill) and re-imagine characters.

You want a black Spider-Man? Then you want Miles Morales of Earth-1610 (Ultimate Marvel) a dimension where Peter Parker was killed. But don't worry, Peter Parker is still alive and well in Earth-616 (and many others).

A beautiful example of these dimensions is Deadpool Corps.

The Earth-616 Deadpool travels across the parallel dimensions to recruit a team of alternate versions of himself. He selects Lady Deadpool (Earth-3010), Kidpool (Earth-10330), Dogpool (Earth-103173), and Headpool (Earth-2149). After the team is put together, hilarity ensues.

At the bottom of the list are the movies.

Earth-199999 appears to contain Iron Man, Iron Man 2, The Incredible Hulk, Thor, Captain America: The First Avenger, and The Avengers. Notice that The Hulk (movie) is not listed. That movie was so bad that Marvel kicked it out of the entire Marvel Universe. LOLz. Also notice the Guardians of the Galaxy in the announced section. This is the craziest team of super heroes ever. Even crazier than the Deadpool Corps.

So basically, Marvel created a storytelling ecosystem with infinite possibilities. It's how writers/directors/artists twist the characters and place them in new and different situations that makes the changes so interesting.

October In Full Force

It's been four weeks since Resident Evil 6 dropped and I still don't think I've played enough of it to adequately "review" it. Then again, I haven't played it that much. I blame the game itself. But I can also blame another game: Dead Space. Yes, the original Dead Space. This red-cased, greatest hits game is scarier than most of Resident Evil 4, all of Resident Evil 5, and what I've played of Resident Evil 6 combined.

Sneaking through the Ishimura a couple weekends ago was satisfying and creepy; to add extra tension, I'm going for the plasma cutter challenge and only using that weapon. At first I thought it was hard to shoot for the limbs and appendages (I'm a seasoned zombie killer, aiming for skulls) but I slowly got the hang of it. I'm also a fan of the Kinesis module; sharp objects and explosive canisters are launched at anything that moves. The most fun I've had in-game has involved creative killing with gas tanks and shrapnel.

Unfortunately, the Kinesis module isn't that original. I've encountered the mechanic before in Half-Life 2 and Doom 3: Resurrection of Evil, but it's still fun to use. It's definitely a good thing that weapons like the gravity gun don't exist in real life, because I would cause all kinds of trouble armed with one.

Out in the real world, everything around the DoNothingMan is falling apart. I still can't get my twitter feed to display in the blog margins (this just suddenly started happening and I don't know to fix it) and last Thursday my van decided to stop running. Hopefully I can bring it back to life.

It's Turtle Time, Again

As a childhood fan of the late '80s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon (and later the comics), I always pay attention to the goings on of the Turtles.

A couple weekends ago a new cartoon dropped on Nickelodeon. Being a little jaded because of the re-makes that seem to be popping up everywhere, I wasn't excited about the 2012 Nickelodeon Turtles. The 2003 re-make did get me excited about watching Saturday morning cartoons again, even though I was still in high school. That excitement quickly faded after the first season and I completely stopped watching sometime in the second season. But being a college student also had something to do with that.

Anyway, I realized while watching the 2003 Turtles that I like my heroes-in-a-half-shell goofy. At least while they're on TV. The one good thing that came out of the 2003 series was Turtles Forever. A crazy mash-up of all the TMNT universes, Turtles Forever brought the 1987 crew and 2003 crew together with the comic book crew. Twelve turtles. Count 'em. Twelve. The coolest part was seeing all the different art styles mesh together. But the 1987 Turtle Van is the best Turtle Van so far. I will argue that point to the death.

I haven't seen a Turtle Van in the 2012 series yet, but they have alluded to it. "That means we have a van!" says Michelangelo while he and his brothers are staking out a rooftop. And I laughed. I laughed a lot, actually. The two-part, first episode was funny. The same goes for the third episode, "Turtle Temper" that aired this past weekend. I don't think we're going to get Bebop and Rocksteady, but so far, the 2012 series is goofy. I actually watched the first, two-part episode with a good buddy and fellow Turtles fan on Saturday. We both had our gripes. But we both enjoyed the show.

Donatello is still my favorite of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; he is one of the reasons that I was (and still am) so interested in technology. I'm glad he's remaining nerdy and goofy in this newest installment. For now, I'll keep watching.

Nothing Is Sacred

Let's just say, I wouldn't be surprised if Capcom decided to remake Resident Evil 2.

After running into this post on Destructoid, I decided that it makes financial sense. After the rage subsided, I came to that conclusion. RE2 is my favorite Resident Evil game; it's quite possibly my favorite video game ever. I don't venture over to Gamespot very often, but the article about Capcom appealing for fan support is pretty lacking. The comments, however, are awesome. It's a healthy mix of action-RE enthusiasts and the classic-RE lovers (that's me). I don't have much to say about this; I could go into another Resident Evil rant, but I think I've said all there is to say. When I find something else to add, you can bet that I'll post it here.

In other news, the Columbus Comic Con is this weekend in the gloomy autumn buckeye state. For right now, I'm planning on attending and taking some sweet pictures.

I've never actually been to a comic convention before. The experience is the big draw for me; I'm not going to see a particular artist or celebrity. However, I would wait in line to see a couple guests. The Boondock Saints will be there, which is cool. If I could get all three of those guys to sign my Saints DVD that would be awesome. But honestly, I'd be happy just shaking their hands and telling them that I'm a fan.

The other person I'm semi-interested in meeting is Arthur Suydam; he's a cover artist. I know of him from Marvel Zombies and Deadpool: Merc with a Mouth. His Deadpool movie parody covers are my favorite.

Unfortunately, Ohio doesn’t get the big spectacle that the San Diego Comic Con gets. Ohio disappoints me. But it is Ohio. My expectations are not lofty.

Resident Evil 6 Demo: The Rule of Thirds

After a boring, 8-hour work day, I came home yesterday knowing that the Resident Evil 6 demo was going live. I hopped onto the PlayStation and I found nothing. No Resident Evil 6 Demo to download. WTF, I thought to myself. Eh, it's probably just Sony being Sony and effing something up. I'll play Skyrim instead (yeah, I haven't killed a dragon in months).

So I killed a dragon outside of Riften. Then I looked at my to-do list of quests and thought they all seemed mundane. Pausing, I checked the Internet for any news about Sony not having the RE6 demo (couldn't find any) and I switched to a Skyrim wiki and landed on a page about the Ghostblade. That's what I need, the Ghostblade. So I played until I obtained the Ghostblade.

An hour or two later, with the Ghostblade in my hot little hands, I checked PSN again and the RE6 demo was there. Spooky. So I downloaded it and played it. Here are my thoughts:

Finally, I can set aside all my speculation and muckraking - I have played a demo for Resident Evil 6 and it wasn't that bad. I'll get into more detail below, but I generally enjoyed the appetizer experience contained within the demo. As a preview for all three main campaigns, the demo lets you play as Chris, Leon, and Jake (their partners we're also selectable, but I only played the main characters). Each campaign is different and each character plays differently (we already knew that) but there is wide gulf that separates them, wider then I suspected.

Twenty Minutes of Chris

Band of Bros

No, I'm not abbreviating "brothers" here or alluding to the epic series. This is the BRO GAMER campaign. "Is he always this awesome?" says the rookie BSA moron as Chris Redfield walks away. Yes rookie...Chris is so awesome that he's probably the only one who will survive this mission. This means you’re going to die a horrible death at the hands of zombie hulk.

The running and gunning in Chris's twenty minutes felt exactly like RE5, but slightly faster. Switching weapons has the same intuitive directional pad controls as RE5. Healing was less intuitive until I realized herbs were picked up and compressed into Tic-Tac form. You have to go into your inventory to combine herbs and load them into your Tic-Tac container. The pop-a-health-Tic-Tac button is R2 and you can pig out like fat kid with Pez dispenser (as long as your container is loaded).

I used Chris's pistol more than his automatic weapon; the machine gun hopped around as you fired (I guess that's realism for you). Anyway, I was able to pick off a rocket launcher goon all the way across the map with the pistol as I was killing time while the BSA rookie was planting charges or something. Timed survival seemed to be a common theme. Twenty minutes of Chris's foray into the world of Call of Duty wasn't bad. But I don't know if I can survive the brotastic bullshit for an entire campaign; I played Chris's first because I knew it would be the hardest for me to stomach. And I was right.

Twenty Minutes of Jake

Zombie Tyranitars

Of the three characters, I am the most curious about Jake Muller, the supposed son of Albert Wesker. The demo didn't give away much of Jake's story; he is paired with Sherry Birkin and that can't be for no reason at all.

Jake's gameplay featured the most variety and the most surprising enemies. He comes fully loaded with a pistol, hand-cannon (think elephant gun, stranger), machine gun, sniper rifle, and hand-to-hand. Yes, you have to equip hand-to-hand. Jake's twenty minutes trained me in the ways of melee and close combat of RE6 and that's only because it was the best way to deal with the zombie lizards.

More like zombie tyranitars. Almost every infected enemy crusted over after you defeated them. Some of the crusties then broke apart revealing this new enemy. Sure, I could've wasted all my ammo on the zombie tyranitars, but it was most effective to engage the beasts in hand-to-hand and beat the brains out of them. More satisfying too.

Jake's run felt more familiar then Chris's; it actually felt the most like RE4 when you get onto the island. And I'm okay with that. I can only hope that Jake's story is well hashed out in the full game. After all, he has his father's shoes to fill.

Twenty Minutes of Leon

My Knife and the Ghostblade

I almost played as Leon S. Kennedy first, but I'm glad I didn't; I saved the best for last. Leon's twenty minutes felt like classic Resident Evil crossed with RE4.

I remember when books were used to hide things like keys, emblems, and clues.

The opening cut-scene drew from the first zombie encounter in the mansion back in 1997. Only I didn't actually get to shoot the zombie...cut-scene Leon shot the zombie and he looked cool doing it too. You then assume control of Leon on a college campus with a new flesh-bag partner (who isn't completely worthless) and joining the team again, codec-style is Hunnigan. Yesh!

Leon comes equipped with a pistol and his combat knife. I switched to the combat knife right away because the pistol only had forty bullets. Better conserve ammo, I thought. It was a good feeling, one I've not felt since Code Veronica. The zombies are zombies, occasionally they'll be carrying something that you can snatch away and use against them only once. I used the knife and the melee attacks for Leon's entire twenty minutes. Awesome. But I did notice the new stamina bar, which I drained quickly going all up-close-and-personal with the undead. My partner did help me get out of some tight spots and I had to use grapple quick-time events to get the touchy-feely zombies off me.

Resident Evil 6 now includes decorative urinal cakes.

The demo ended with an awkward quick-time event in a police car looking for the keys as zombies attacked and climbed all over the cruiser. Annoying, but it was tense. Leon's run was definitely my favorite; I might even play it again. I might even use his partner...I forget her name already and I don't feel like googling it.

Two Thirds Satisfied

One Third Worried

That seems to be a good summary of my experiences with the Resident Evil 6 demo. Overall, I was happy with it. Chris's campaign bothers me and it will probably still bother me when I play it in full. However, if I hadn't already pre-ordered Resident Evil 6, this demo would've sealed the deal. I am looking forward to playing the full game on October 2.

I Am Weak: Forgive My Flip-Flopping

It happens every fall; the do-nothing feeling sweeps over me and all I want to do is watch the gray sky rain and play video games.

My autumn line-up is pretty much in stone: Resident Evil 6, Doom 3 BFG Edition, and Halo 4.

Yes, I know I caved to Capcom on the whole RE6 thing, but I'm choosing to remain an annoyed yet optimistic fan of the series. With a replay of Resident Evil 4 nudging out Diablo 3 for my prime-time gaming slot, I'm reminded of how "fun" the over-the-shoulder-action-horror Resident Evil can be. Sure, I still miss the fixed camera and the atmosphere of the early games, but I am enjoying RE4. Again.

It also helps that one of my good friends is picking up RE6 and we're planning on co-opping through it. I know I'm definitely excited about playing RE6 with another long-time Resident Evil fan. This guy and I played through RE2, RE3, and Code Veronica together, passing the controller back and forth. That's how we had to co-op back in the '90s.

The Mercenaries Mode is another factor in RE6's favor. Ever since Resident Evil 3, I have enjoyed the Mercenaries minigame though it has changed considerably since then. I wish I could customize the load-out for each of the mercenaries, but that's never been an option, ever. So I'll just stay in my corner and whine about it.

Plus, the new RE6 demo actually drops today. Look at me, being all timely and current. If I'm not engrossed in RE4, I'll be downloading that tonight; might even write about it later.

Doom 3 and Halo 4 are going to be big-budget diversions; I've already played and beaten Doom 3 on the Xbox (it'll be fun to revisit in the dark and in HD) and Halo 4 is just for the online multiplayer (maybe I'll actually complete a Halo single player campaign, probably not).

I Hate August

This is what I think of August:

It's too hot to do anything.

August is when I start the count-down to Halloween.

School starts in August

There are no good holiday's in August.

No good games come out in August.

August is for slackers.

My Fantasy Team: Pawns, Points, and Munchkin

This fall marks an unprecedented moment in my gaming life: I'm playing fantasy football for the first time ever, ever. So far, I've been pretty hands off (I let the yahoo robots draft my team) and things seem to be going well. I don't think I could have done better had I drafted my team in person.

With very little connection to these players, I'm just viewing them as pawns. That seems too generous. These players are more like energy sources; their statistics a numerical fuel that produces points. Points? Ug. I hate points.

The top point sources are my nine starting players, plus a defense. Then I have seven players who are "sitting on the bench," but I'm thinking of them as unequipped or stored in my stash. Honestly, these nonstarters are pretty crappy; trash items in gaming terms.

Now I'm thinking of my players in terms of equipment...like in...

Yes! Fantasy football is Munchkin! It all makes sense now.

I'm strapping players to my body as armor and wielding players as weapons. Each player provides an undetermined amount of points that count to my total. At the end of the week, my opponent and I tally our points and go head to head using that point total. The person with the equipment that generates the most points wins. It's that easy.

The truth is that I'm having a lot of fun imagining Drew Brees as chainsaw or fruitcake. Too bad he's not on my team. Instead I have Michael Vick. I guess, as a piece of equipment, he could be a spikey dog collar (+3 against Animal Rights Activists).

Keeping with the fantasy theme, I have a douchey-looking white wide receiver named Eric Decker and I've already started calling him Eric Deckard Cain.

Did I mention that I don't give two craps about NFL football? Or its players? I barely give one crap about college football. It was the NAU Grease Rats that got me caring about football at all. In memory of that NCAA Football 2007 college team, I named my fantasy football team The Grease Rats. Perhaps it will bring me luck. Greasy rats are lucky, right?

A Summer Sans PS3

August always signals the end of summer for me. Yeah, schools don't start for a couple more days, but by the middle of August, summer is basically gone.

After flipping through a couple older posts and looking over my gaming notes (yes, I have gaming notes), I arrived at a shocking revelation. I have not played my PlayStation 3 at all this summer. My gaming time consisted of the following:

Diablo 3 (PC)
Tribes: Ascend (PC)
League of Legends (PC)
Saint's Row 3 (Xbox 360)
Just Cause 2 (Xbox 360)
Pokémon Emerald (GBA/DS Lite)

Yep, that looks about right. I'm almost finished with Emerald and I'm a complete noob on League of Legends, but Diablo 3 and the sandbox games have kept me pretty occupied. Receiving the most ink, though, are Diablo 3 and Pokémon because I just enjoy writing about demons and pocket monsters.

As an avid PlayStation fan, I feel I must explain my summer of transgression. Excuse number one is that I moved and it's taken time to get things set back up. Lame reason. Excuse number two is that my PS3 currently has no sound. During the move, I decided to commit my surround sound speakers to my gaming PC for demon slaughtering eargasms. This left the PS3 with no audio device and me with an excuse to explore the world of surround sound headsets. And I haven't found a pair that I like.

I've never been an audiophiliac, but recently, I've had an unusual appetite for video game audio and becoming totally present in a gaming reality. That means tuning out the real world and tuning into the game world; the complete immersion of self. And listening to a game through sound cancelling headphones seemed like the best way to accomplish such immersion.

The plan was to pick up a pair of headphones for my PS3. The problem is that one does not simply "pick up" a pair of gaming headphones. Maybe I just don't know enough about quality audio, but between Turtle Beach nonsense and Logitech fluff, I'm not really sure what I'm doing.

The minute I decided on a pair, the Tritton Ax Pro, I read about a new pair coming out this fall; an updated or upgraded version of the Tritton Ax Pro. I really wish the name was Tritton Axe Pro, which sounds like a wicked combination of two-handed melee weapons.

The Nostalgia Sell: Resident Evil 6

It's time for more of this Resident Evil crapfest. Is crapfest a word? It should be, because it paints a perfect picture of how Capcom has transformed Resident Evil. Quite a feat, if you ask me; if Capcom set out to maim the Resident Evil franchise, then they deserve to celebrate, because they have ruined a magnificent series of games.

The truly sad part of all this: I still like Resident Evil games. I can't say love. I used to love Resident Evil back in the PlayStation days. So when I saw this on Amazon, I was excited. Harkening back to my craving for sweet pre-order bonuses, when I saw the Resident Evil Anthology pack, I thought: that's a super-awesome deal. Forget Leon's jacket, an Africa necklace, or a mini Chris Redfield (and think other shiny pre-order goodies), let's give out the other RE games.

The Resident Evil Anthology: at first glance, this looked like an amazing deal. Then my common sense started tingling.

Wait a minute...
This contains six Resident Evil games. Three of my favorite games (the first three) and three that I'm not all that crazy about.

Wait a minute...
I already own all of these games (in disk form) except the 6th one.

Wait a minute...
Resident Evil 6 costs $59.99 alone, which means they're charging thirty bucks for the five other games.

Wait a minute...
That means Resident Evil 6 is insanely over-priced.

Nostalgia clouded my judgment, nearly causing me to make a bad decision. Touché, Capcom. You almost had me there. Marketing strategy suggests that when we look at this bundle, we think we're getting all this awesome stuff with the new game. The reversal (and maybe closer to the truth, I fear) is that Capcom is re-selling what made Resident Evil so great and tacking on RE5 and RE6 like the backwards little runts that they are.

Kind of like the Indiana Jones 4 Pack. Nobody's going to buy Kingdom of the Crystal Skull by itself. So they have to bundle it with the other three good movies.

I'm being pretty harsh here. I haven't played Resident Evil 6 nor have I played its demo. I've seen some cool gameplay footage over at Kotaku and that's about it. The bottom line is that I'm not fond of the Resident Evil action game. And I hope Capcom doesn't turn Resident Evil 6 into a knock off of Call of Duty Zombies.

Dead Again, Are We Mr. Pool?

Holy Crap!

Given that July is my birth month, I was contemplating a break from the blog; however, I stumbled upon this lovely treasure while surfing over at gamesradar (my new favorite place to read about funny video game news):

A DEADPOOL VIDEO GAME

With the exception of Batman's Arkham series and Spider-Man: Web of Shadows, I usually keep my distance from super hero games. So when I read about Deadpool's own game, I was slightly worried. Now Deadpool has made some great appearances in super hero games that I like (X-Men Legends 2 and Marvel Ultimate Alliance) and others that I've never played. My only hope is that Deadpool retains his signature style and ridiculousness. If the website and trailer are any indication of what is to come, then this is indeed happening...a very good sign. Check out the site and its social media connections. I just started following Wade Wilson on twitter; this probably should have happened a long time ago.

What I'm most excited about Deadpool's foray into the world of video games is his ability (similar to Spider-Man's) to pull a character roster from all across the Marvel universe. He could get all the weird fringe characters and I'd still be happy. Even a little, mini Lego Deadpool level would be sweet. I have a Lego Deadpool minifig. I'm just saying.

With his trusty pistol in one hand and a vial of horse tranquilizer in the other, Lego Deadpool rides a pterodactyl soaring towards adventure and mayhem.

Unfortunately Lego Deadpool is not featured with a Lego pterodactyl. Someday. But the opportunity for more craziness like this is always present whenever Deadpool is around. Such craziness is what I am most anticipating in the Deadpool video game.

Re-Router For Diablo 3

With too few hours into my Diablo 3 witch doctor, I can't really complain about the game yet. Nor can I shower it with praise. I've enjoyed the little time I've spent hucking spider grenades at goatmen. However, one foe as popped up and presented a challenge that I had not suspected. Last night, whilst fighting spiders with spiders, my router melted, ate itself, and then died. In that exact order. Now I can't play Diablo 3. And I need a new router.

I know I could plug straight into my cable modem; however, I used the downtime to revert to Diablo 2 and kick some ass in Kurast. The always online issue has been a hot topic as of late. I don't see Diablo's requirement to always be connected to the Internet as a violation. But it is an annoyance. For instance, if Diablo 3 didn't require an Internet connection, there is no way that I would be running out to replace my router right away. I want to play this game. And I'm enjoying this game. But this is the first time that I've ever owned a game that I don't feel is completely mine.

I hopped over to Diablo 2 for many reasons: I was already in my click-demons-to-death mood, both games are installed on the same machine, it wasn't time to go to sleep, and I didn't have to be connected to the Internet. There are plenty of games that I love to play that do not require an Internet connection. I wish Diablo 3 were one of them; I understand why it is not. But still, if, for whatever reason, I don't have access to the Internet, I will play a game that does not require access to the Internet. Duh, right?

This might be a reason that I don't play or enjoy Diablo 3 as much as other gamers.

Picking up a new router means a trip to the local MicroCenter; it's always fun meandering through the store and checking out new technology. The old Netgear router (may she rest in peace) has been due for an upgrade; I'm pretty sure the thing is about seven years old. Old enough that my Nintendo DS can't connect to it. That should've been the reason to upgrade long ago. Must trade Pokémon.

If the replacement router can instantly connect to my DS, I might drop Diablo and move right back to Soul Silver in trading mode. Setting up the router should be quick and if I can plug and go with ethernet cables, I might be right back into Diablo 3. We'll see.

Or I might go back to Kurast and brain Mephisto. Actually, this sounds like the most fun.

What's the Password?

The new quarters is coming together well. It's not done, that's for sure, but it'll soon be complete. I've been playing Diablo 3 since Saturday night; yeah, I've had a late start because of, you know, moving. All of the Diablo 3 hype has me thinking of the fun times in Diablo 2. And they were good times. I can't really complain about Diablo 3 yet; I'm only a level 13 witch doctor. But I can complain about people complaining about Diablo 3. They suck.

Thanks to Diablo 3, I've been itching to crack open Diablo 2 again, but, I don't think my little netbook could handle Diablo 2 and its expansion pack. Although, it does play Fallout Tactics very well. I might just give it a shot. Recently, my Acer netbook suffered a serious blow, which got me thinking about backing up data. Almost a week later, I lost my 1GB USB flash drive; I have no idea where it is (but I have been packing things up in boxes); I'm hopeful that it'll turn up. Until then, I've initiated a complete password overhaul. That's right, any account of mine that has a password is getting a new password.

I've already changed a couple of them, but I have a whole list to update (and a copy of said list might have been on my missing flash drive). Being the crazy person that I am, I have many, many email address and various accounts tied to each email address. Every time I open a web browser, I feel like someone could be trolling out my passwords.

Password construction has been going all week. I have a couple good ones. The lists tops off around thirty, so I still have some work ahead. Password creation is a tricky subject; I've heard lots of ideas about how to make passwords and more specifically, how to remember passwords. Frequent use tattoos most passwords to my brain; I guess I'm just sharp like that. The ones I don't use often get written down (typed up) and stored where I can easily access them. Unfortunately, when the storage is digital, there's always the risk of corruption, theft, cash, or simply misplacement. So I make my list, print said list, store it in a Resident Evil 2 GameCube game case, and save the original file (usually a text document) in some obscure folder on my hard drive.

Oh crap, now the Internet knows where I hide my passwords.

I am ashamed to admit this, but one of my passwords I've had since high school. It's my favorite one, no doubt. I am going to change it. To honor its memory, I'll drop a visual clue.

Taken 2

So, during my half-hour lunch break, I discovered that "they"
(the infamous they of Hollywood, money-hungry retards) are making a sequel to Taken.

I found this tweet about it. Needless to say, I re-tweeted right away.



Sometimes, micro-blogging is the answer. Thank you, SoVeryAwkward.

That's What I Need: More Doom

Some pretty crazy news has surfaced about a Doom 3 re-release. Openly, I'll admit to being a rabid Disgaea, Fallout, and Resident Evil fan; I'll even quietly admit to playing the Pokémon games and older Final Fantasy games. But the fandom started with a little 3.5 in floppy disk containing the shareware version of Doom.

If I still had that floppy, I would snap a picture for this post, but I don't. I did what we all did back in 3rd grade with that disk. Someone gave it to me. I took it home and installed it. I brought the disk back to school and passed it on to the next kid. That was how sharing software worked back then. To this day, Doom is still one of my favorite games. It still ends up on all of my windows machines. When most people get bored at their computer, they open up solitaire or click through minesweeper. Not me. I open up Doom.

This is not what Doom looks like, but this is my screen capture output. I thought it looked cool anyway; fits the blog color scheme and I'm too lazy to try and fix it.

The original Xbox was a dorm room stable during my college years; we all played Halo and Halo 2, of course. But when Doom 3 made its Xbox debut, I went out and bought my own Xbox console. So I could play Doom 3 and not have to share with all the crazy Halo nuts. The Doom 3 experience was solely single-player for me; I blasted my way through the Mars UAC research facility, going late into cool spring nights with my own Xbox and 19 inch television stashed in my dark bedroom. While playing the game, I wanted to be scared. And, for the most part, I was.

Doom 3 was an excellent experience, but when I want to play Doom, I still turn to the Doom installed on my little netbook. If I'm sitting at my Xbox 360 and I get the Doom itch, I can play the XBLA version of Doom, which I downloaded on a whim when first appeared. I didn't even know it was taken down and put back up until recently. I do prefer the keyboard instead of a game controller when it comes to the original Doom games though.

Like I need excuses to play more Doom, but a graphically enhanced PS3 version with the Resurrection of Evil expansion and new levels. That's more than a good excuse to play more Doom; that's a damn good reason to play more Doom.

Getting Lucky: Hot Dogs and Pokémon

Just because hot dogs only cost ten cents at the ball park doesn't mean you should eat as much as possible. Had the lines not been insane, I probably could have killed myself. Death by hot dog overdose.

Dime-a-dog night is how you get me to go to baseball games. Especially if the tickets are free. Baseball has never interested me. I like throwing a ball around in the back yard; that's fun. But playing the sport. Nope. Actually watching the sport. Hell nope.

I'd take Blernsball over baseball all the time.

Per usual, my mind is wandering and I've completely let go of the leash. This is turning into one of those bad, unfocused posts that goes nowhere and accomplishes nothing. Well, I guess it accomplishes something: I'm having fun writing it. There.

A recent quest is nearing completion (I just got the phone call last night); I have the Gameboy Advance Pokémon Sapphire game waiting for pick-up at a local used game store. When I purchase it, I'll have all five generation three games: Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald, FireRed, and LeafGreen. I've spent about eighty bucks bringing the bunch together. The plan is to play through them all (of course) and sell them as a set later on. I'll post those details when I get there. I haven't had much luck selling things lately; maybe I'll get lucky with Pokémon.

Have I mentioned I can't play Diablo III? I can't play Diablo III.

New computer components are still in the mail.

Apartment 101

Three years and nine months. That's how long I've been living in Apartment 101; that's a long time for me, considering I moved every summer while I was in undergrad. In the end, it'll be three years and ten months because the lease is up at the end of June. But my new lease at my new place starts sometime in May. So I'll be doubling up on rent for part of May and all of June. Easy for moving. Bad for the budget. So let's take a moment and remember the good times at Apartment 101.

I can't think of any. Kidding.

Apartment 101 housed me at my most productive and my most lazy. I think of John Nash and Jeff "The Dude" Lebowski; spanning one far end of the spectrum to the other and back again. Graduate school, teaching, working for the university, and unemployment (six sweet long months of it). Video games, video editing, and travel preceded job hunting, interviews, and eventually returning to work. I'm not back to John Nash, but I moving in that direction. Thousands, if not millions, of zombies have died by my hands in bowels of Apartment 101.

The Northern Alaska University was founded in Barrow, Alaska thanks to my Apartment 101 roommate and NCAA Football 2007 on the PS2. The NAU Grease Rats football team is still undefeated. However, the NAU Grease Rats synchronized swimming team has a very high mortality rate. University officials are currently investigating this problem. If I want to continue coaching the Grease Rats, I'm going to have to pick up my own copy of the game. Shouldn't be too hard to find.

When I talk about the bowels of Apartment 101, I'm specifically referring to my bedroom. I used to call my bedroom Frostbite Heights because as I moved from apartment to apartment during my undergrad years, I always seemed to occupy a third floor room. The name didn't stick in Apartment 101, because we were basically in the basement of our apartment complex. No complaints here; I always think of basements are really shallow dungeons. The new place is an actual house and I'll be occupying a second floor bedroom (there's no third floor) so I can break out the Frostbite Heights sign again.

In the end, Apartment 101 has been an awesome stop on my journey so far. It will be missed; it will always be remembered.

WTF? Really Spider-man? Really?

So I get weird emails from Sony Pictures in my spammy yahoo account. This was in that mailbox this morning. I was excited, then horrified, then repulsed, then just sad.

The Last Half Hour

It's a difficult period of time to describe.

Last half hour to go
Seconds feel like eternities
I am almost done

My van waits below
Eager, impatient, ready
Calling for its keys

Three flights of stairs down
Escaping the parking lot
To the long sprint home

Only minutes pass
And I remain keyboard glued
Working and waiting

Just Sippin' Blue Mana Margaritas

There was a time in the not-to-distant past that I hacked and slashed my way through the realms of the sanctuary. I'm not sure if I should capitalize that or not; I'm not up on the lore. Perhaps, "I've been clicking monsters to death since 1998," is a better way to describe my endearment to the world of Diablo. At the time, I was amazed I could play both Diablo and eventually its sequel on my old desktop machine. But I am bummed that I've never had the chance to play Diablo on the PlayStation. Someday.

Nothing is better than swinging a sword or an axe into an army of skeletons, so I always played a warrior in Diablo. I tried the rogue once and hated her guts; I completely ignored the sorcerer. I'm an in-your-face demon slayer; if I'm not feeling the spray of blood then what's the point right? This trend continued in Diablo 2 with the barbarian. In fact, my first play-though was all barbarian, all duel-axes, and all whirlwind. The image of this armored giant with a battle axe in each hand spinning and flailing around in the middle of enemy hordes just made me laugh.

After my barbarian urges were satisfied, I explored the other classes and fell for the necromancer. It was love at first summon.

"You mean I can summon an army of skeletons to do my bidding?! I'll just sit over here and let Mr. Bones and his badass buddies do all my dirty work while I sip mana potion margaritas."





Again, a necromancer with a yew wand in one hand and a blue margarita in the other just makes me all happy and tingly inside. Then I discovered my true beverage of choice: poison.

Ever since the Lord of Destruction expansion, I've been running poison necromancers. Letting the monsters swarm around me then casting poison nova is one of the best feelings I've ever had in all my years of playing video games. Still so much fun.

With Diablo 3 landing next week, I am looking forward to the long-awaited sequel; however, I don't think I'll get the same gush of excitement that Diablo 2 supplied me since the turn of the millennium. With the little research that I've done, I know I'll play my first run as a witch doctor and I don't think that Plague of Toads or Acid Cloud will be as awesome as Poison Nova. Some of the doc's passive abilities look very compelling; for instance: Fetish Sycophants grants the chance to summon those jibber-jabbering little midgets from the jungle levels of Diablo 2, Act 3. I love those little dudes.

Then there's also the Firebats ability which summons a flock of flaming bats; I would rather chuck flaming cats at my enemies' faces. But whatever. That seems like something a crazy witch doctor would do, right?

Besides reading about the witch doctor and watching a sweet Diablo vs. Angels cartoon, I haven't looked into Diablo 3 that much. Maybe because I want to be surprised. This Diablo fan is hopeful.